Grief doesn’t change you
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| Source: BlogChatter |
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"Grief doesn’t change you but it reveals you" — John Green
Grief hits the most when the unfortunate event has already happened and you realize that what you thought to be yours, is no longer there.
During an unfortunate event, we are in utter shock to process anything. The happening of the event leaves an indelible print on our minds.
I always looked forward to Fridays, especially Friday evenings which would mark the beginning of the Weekend until 07.03.2025 when I got a fever that stayed with me for the next few days and changed my life forever.
What worse can a mere fever cause, one may ask?
Well, anything can happen from a simple thing nobody ever imagined. I am not writing it to create a sense of fear in the minds of the readers, but writing to ease my grief a bit as writing has a therapeutic effect on me.
Life is strange, things happen beyond our comprehension and we start looking for answers. I am in that stage of my life and looking for many answers from God.
People say life has strange ways to make people humble but what about humble people, why does life play games to punish them for the mistakes they never made?
Even though grief gets better with time but realization that what you thought was yours, is no longer yours, hits the hardest.
“Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.” — Vicki Harrison
Healing from grief is a slow process and demands a lot of patience. When you think you’ve healed from the grief, the grief surfaces once again, making everything look so fresh.
Nearly thirteen days have passed since that unfortunate event, no matter how much I try to heal but I’ve lost a part of me in the process. I was reborn and I am no longer the same.
I may look strong from the outside but I break down in the middle of any task that I do, in a day. It just doesn’t happen once but many times. A part of my mind and heart is still stuck at the hospital when I got relieved on 11.03.2025.
I often ask God why he had to be cruel to me but I get no answer.
Grief has revealed a part of me that I never knew existed. It has evoked a more empathetic self for my husband and I observed a similar change in him towards me. Couldn’t life teach this lesson in a better way?
When my grief-stricken self can’t see the big picture at this moment, all I can do is hold the happy memories associated with the event close to my heart and feel grateful for them. It was a part of me and will be an integral part of me forever.
"What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” — Helen Keller
Right now, even though I am many miles away from complete healing; both at physical and emotional levels, I am trying to do all that I promised myself to do; taking baby steps, one day at a time, so that when I look back, I will be proud of myself for embracing the beauty of those scars.
"The pain passes, but the beauty remains.”
— Pierre Auguste Renoir
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| Source: BlogChatter |
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Swati Sarangi
21.03.2025
